Chapter 4 Doss Thoughts by Erica Schiller

   While most of what Doss has said has been interesting thus far, the most interesting thing about this chapter was that it really made me think, long after I had finished the reading.  Being a deeply patriotic person who comes from a very patriotic family (and area), I have never questioned the American tendency to venerate war and conflict.  I never really thought about how we define ourselves through our militarism, or how choices like the WWII memorial make such a difference in what's what on the national mall.  I didn't know what to think.  I feel very conflicted.  On one hand, I have always enjoyed "war porn"--a term which first offended me--but I'm not sure, upon thinking more deeply, that I want to enjoy it.  I feel guilty, like my society has done something wrong.  I had a friend in high school from Switzerland who occasionally commented on things like this, and it really bothered me.  I used to argue that she just couldn't enjoy the American experience, and if she didn't like our country, she shouldn't have come here in the first place.  But is that really the right argument to make?  I don't know anymore.  I love my country immensely, and am deeply loyal to everything the United States stands for, but my feelings are so deeply tied to our military victories and how we have worked for justice and freedom globally that I'm not sure how to separate my patriotism from our wars.  It makes me question my own judgement and the judgement of my country.  I'm not sure I like that.